To fart or not to fart: That's Malawi's burning question

Wow. And there are those that think Malawi is slightly backward when it comes to the rule of law and the local court system - well the doubters have sadly been proved right with the latest debacle going on in Malawi's parliament.

So what are the facts?

George Chaponda, Malawi's justice minister: George is aiming to pass a bill, part of which criminalises passing wind in public to protect Malawi's public standards.

Anthony Kamanga, Malawi's solicitor general: Anthony is completely opposed to farting, deeming the clause in the act as just covering 'pollution' rather than farting in public.

So how will they enforce it?

The plan is to hand over enforcement of this to local police chiefs, supposedly to be enforced alongside such acts as urinating in public.

What does Malawi think?

Malawi's people are divided. On the one hand they see an ebb of civil liberties being taken away from them. Other's are quoted from various sources as agreeing that the improvement in

What next?

Well, with this being argued about - the bill is supposed to pass next week - expect some potential delays!

I'd love to hear your thoughts - just post them below!!

7 Names You're Likely to Hear in Malawi

I recently had an email through from http://www.experiencemalawi.com/ from someone who was wanting to know a few ideas for Malawian names, this got me thinking about the names Malawians give their children, and so I thought I'd blog it! So here's my take on 7 names you'd be surprised to hear in Malawi.

1. Loveness
One of the stranger names I've heard, Loveness seems to be a derivation of loveliness. The lady who possessed this name was suitably lovely!

2. Chance
Pronounced 'Chancey', this is not a hugely common name, but one I've heard in my travels. Quite fun - you can only imagine the origins!

3. Charity
Quite a cute one, charity is a popular name in Malawi.

4. Blessings
Also quite a cute name, blessings is a popular name in Malawi. This is translated from the name 'Dalitso'.

5. Shame
The owner of this name was actually called John, but he was known as Shame - when asked why, there was no coherent answer, just something that he had always been called. I sensed there was another story there, but didn't manage to get to the bottom of it!

6. Happy
No, not a dwarf, but the name of someone I met in the Karonga Boma area, all his friends called him Happy - a really appropriate name for someone from Malawi, I'm sure you'd agree!

7. Chastity
Hmm...ok while some of the others I can understand, and think are quite cute - this is the most ironic name I've ever heard (you give your child the name Chastity) but then religion does play a big part in many Malawian people's lives so maybe it's a reflection of that!

So those are just a few names that I've picked up in Malawi - are there any I've missed? I'd love to hear your comments!

Karonga story: The recent earthquakes in Malawi

This post takes a more serious look at some of the real life situations of local Malawians living in the aftermath of the recent earthquakes in the Northern region of Malawi.

Karonga seems to have borne the brunt of the damage when the earthquakes hit the region last year, and although international aid was quick to arrive, some of the poorer villages are still in a bad way. One of these villages, Mpata, is located about 15km from Karonga Boma, and I recently spent a day there, talking to the inhabitants about their experiences since the natural disaster struck.

Kenja is the village matriarch, a wizened lady 90 years old (roughly, as no-one counted when she was younger), her mouth has retained only a smattering of teeth, testimony to the high sugar diet enjoyed by many poor Malawians, yet her smiling eyes twinkle with happiness, belying her years. She is very matter of fact about the quakes "when the earthquakes began, I thought it was some very large lorries passing on the road nearby", Mpata sits on a recently built road that connects Karonga to a Uranium mine that is being dug for yellow-cake by the Paladin mining company, "but then it continued for a number of minutes. I was in my house, it started to shake so I went outside. I have not slept in my house since that day." She shows me around her house, which is still standing, but has dramatic cracks up the walls, and the structure of the roof is warped.

Kenja is one of the luckier ones in the village, her house was made of bricks, while many of the people had constructed theirs from daub and mud. I noticed not many of those houses were still standing, as I walked around the village.

Kilama is another one who's house was damaged, but is still standing. "My house is damaged, I don't have the means to repair it, so I still sleep here", she tells me (in chingonde), "there was some aid that came, maize and tents mainly, but the tents were bad quality and have already disintegrated."

As many of the villagers are either homeless or say it's too dangerous to sleep in their damaged houses, they have constructed a series of temporary homes, slung together with sticks, straw and black plastic. These look basic, but fine for the dry season, however my fear is when the rainy season arrives later this year many more people will become ill as their temporary accommodation becomes damp, and the mosquitoes begin to breed.

Have you seen any of the aftermath of the earthquake in Karonga? Please share your experiences below.

Top 10 items you need to pack for a trip to Malawi

So, you have your trip booked, great - and you've weighed up the different flight providers, excellent - but what are you going to pack in your 23kg (46kg if you're flying Ethiopian) of luggage space?

I've compiled a list of 'must have' luggage items for your trip to Malawi, whether you are just staying in Lilongwe, or travelling up to the Northern region (and Sambani Lodge!) Or even into Tanzania or Mozambique - here are my top 10 tips for things not to forget:

1. Anti-malarials
Definitely don't forget these. Malawi does have the female mosquitos that carry Malaria, and although prevention is better than cure, if you are bitten you'll be glad you have them. Read my previous article on the anti-malarial drugs available in the UK.

2. Long-sleeved clothing
This ties in with the prevention rather than cure philosophy. Mosquitos are most active at dawn and at dusk, so for these key times, make sure wrists and ankles are properly covered. Mosquitos love these areas of the body, as the blood vessels are close to the surface, and the skin is thin. You could go for socks and gloves as well, but that might be going over the top!

3. Bug spray!
This is turning into a medical post, don't worry, there are non-bug related things to pack! An excellent spray for warding off creepy crawlies will have a high concentration of Deet in it. Make sure you take enough, as there's nothing worse than running out in the middle of nowhere.

4. Old clothes
Sounds silly, right? You don't want to bring old clothes as they'll take up loads of room and you want to wear new stuff on your trip, right? Wrong! Bring a load of old clothes, especially stuff that you don't mind leaving in Malawi; that way when you are travelling you can use your old stuff, which you won't mind getting dirty, and wear your new stuff once you arrive at your destination. The added bonus is Malawians will often take payment for souvenirs in old clothing (or just donations!) so you know your old garments are going towards a good cause.

5. Cheap digital watch
One of the best purchases I've ever made for travelling to Africa is a cheap digital watch. They're really reliable, they don't stand out to thieves as they are quite prolific in Malawi, and you won't mind if it breaks or gets lost, as you only paid a few pounds for it. Just remember the appointments/buses/people in Malawi run on GMT (General Malawi Time) so give everything you do a few hours flexibility.

6. Everything to do with the sun
Sunhat, sunglasses, sun cream etc. Malawi can get hot. Damn hot! Sitting in the tropics, Malawi has pretty consistently hot weather, from north to south. Half the country sits at the top of the rift valley at an altitude of over 1000ft above sea level and common temperatures are 26-33 degrees celsius. If you head down to the lake, whether it be Sambani Lodge in Chintheche or up to Karonga, temperatures push 40 at some times during the year, so make sure you take the usual stuff to protect you from the rays.

7. Camera equipment and a battery charger
It almost goes without saying that you should take your camera, batteries and a charger to Malawi when you go. I just wanted to emphasize a couple of points here. Firstly, Malawi is an AMAZING place to take photographs, I have never taken so many good, high-saturation, colourful photos as I have in Malawi. Secondly, because of the hot humid conditions, your batteries will run out quicker than usual, and there is nothing worse than framing the perfect shot, only to realise you are out of juice!

8. A good library of books
The idea of timekeeping is incredibly loose in Malawi, and, as mentioned earlier, the Malawian attitude to time can be summed up as GMT (general malawi time). As this is the case, if you are doing any travelling around in Malawi, you should be prepared to spend long periods waiting for people or activity. The remedy for this is, of course, ensuring you have the latest version of the lonely planet, or some other weighty tome, to keep you occupied. And of course you can always leave your novel with a friendly (and appreciative) Malawian once you're done.

9. Our Chewa phrasebook
Ok, so I had to get a plug in somewhere! Serioisly though, while most Malawians can speak small amounts of faltering English (and you'll get loads of kids shouting 'how are you' at you), I'd thoroughly recommend buying a copy of our phrasebook (a snip at £3) to help you with some of the common words, phrases and verbs in Chewa. It will REALLY make a splash with local Malawians and springboard you to the centre of attention, whether at a bus stop or in the market.

10. Leave some space!
I mention this one through first-hand experience of having to travel with a carved 'elephant' stool in my hand luggage because it wouldn't fit in my hold baggage allowance. Leave some space as you are likely to want to bring some (lots) of items back from Malawi - whether it be ceramic pieces from the two famous potteries - Dedza and Nkhotakota - carvings, paintings, jewellery or any other souvenirs that can be found throughout the country.

Those are my top 10 for now - let me know what you think you'd add to that list, or if you disagree using the comments section below!

What's the cheapest way to fly to Malawi from London?

Malawi as a holiday destination can be pretty cheap once you're there, but what airlines fly to Malawi from London, what's the cheapest way to get there, and what do you trade off with a cheap flight?

Which airlines fly has been a bone of contention for some time as there used to be direct flights to Malawi with British Airways, which were brilliant. However these flights were stopped around 2000, for reasons unknown. I presume it was uneconomical for them to fly and once the profit margin falters on those long haul flights they get descheduled pretty quickly.

So who actually flies to Malawi from London?

At time of writing, the following airlines are offering a route to Malawi:

• Air France
• KLM
• South African Airlines
• Virgin Atlantic
• Ethiopian Airlines

What routes do these airlines take to Malawi from London?
The Air France route to Malawi is part operated by Kenya Airways, and they fly: London Heathrow > Paris > Nairobi > Lilongwe (Malawi capital in the central region of Malawi)

The KLM route from London to Lilongwe is also part operated by Kenya Airways but their route is: London Heathrow > Amsterdam > Nairobi > Lilongwe

South African airlines offers a longer route which goes: London Heathrow > Johannesburg > Lilongwe

Virgin Atlantic fly (in partnership with South African): London Heathrow > Johannesburg > Lilongwe
Finally, Ethiopian Airlines operates a route to Malawi via its hub in Ethiopia, and its route is: London Heathrow > Addis Ababa > Lusaka or Lubumbashi (refuel) > Lilongwe
That's all great, but how long do they take to get there, and get back?!

                      LHR - LLW        LLW - LHR
Air France       c. 12 hrs          c. 15 hrs
KLM               c. 12 hrs          c. 15 hrs
South African  c. 15 hrs          c. 18 hrs
Ethiopian        c. 14 hrs          c. 20 hrs

Virgin Atlantic  c. 14hrs           c. 15hrs

So, which airline is the cheapest to travel to Malawi?

Without a doubt, the cheapest airline to fly with is Ethiopian Airlines. They are consistently the lowest cost over the course of the year, and their top prices are not that much higher than their value fares. You can expect to pay between £490 - £700 for a flight

The other airlines - KLM/Air France/South African depend on when you book and when you travel, but cost around £600 - £900.

The most expensive is Virgin Atlantic - a flight with them will cost around £1000+


Finally, which is the best airline to fly with?

Well, in this humble blog author's opinion, South African is the best for experience, it's comfortable and the air crew are friendly and experienced (especially if linked with a Virgin Atlantic flight!).

KLM/Air France and good for speed of journey, they get you there quickest, but part of the flight is operated by Kenya Airways, which can be hit and miss, and Nairobi Airport is chaotic.

Ethiopian really fits the mantra that you get what you pay for in a flight, expect chickens in the aisle, toilet lights that don't work and films that are too long for the flight. However it is cheap and you get 46kg baggage allowance - double what the other airlines offer, so plenty of room to bring back oodles of African carvings...if you're happy to sit on a flight for 20 hours!

Customs, Etiquette and Manners in Malawi

This post will cover a few basic rules of culture, manners and etiquette in Malawi.

As a foreigner, you will be observed by most Malawians, especially in the more rural areas as rather strange, with lots of money and some odd habits. There are of course customs and etiquette that should be observed, not least to surprise those Malawians you come into contact with.

Here are some general musings and comments:

• When you shake hands with someone important e.g. ministers, chiefs, school committees, older members of the community/village, bend your knees slightly to show deference, and as you shake put your free hand beneath the other arm, as if you’re propping it up.
  
• Expect to pray before everything: meals, journeys, meetings etc.
  
• Before a meal, the host or hostess will give you a bowl and a jug, to wash your hands in. As most people eat with their hands it is important that you ensure your hands are clean before eating.
  
• If you are having a meeting, expect to sit in silence for a long time. When the chair is speaking, there will be many formalities including welcoming you, thanking everyone for coming and asking after various different parts of the attendees families. You will be expected to speak and say how pleased you are to be there and thanking the hosts for their hospitality.
  
• Don’t expect anyone to be on time. Malawians operate under GMT (General Malawi Time!) so make sure you are not just waiting around, and have something to do. It's not unheard of to arrange to meet someone at 8am and they turn up the next day!
  
• If you visit a school, you will not have to lift a finger. The children automatically do everything for you in the same way as a host in their house. Don't try to stop them they will get offended.
  
• Try not to give anyone money who begs for it. If they do something for you or take you somewhere then give them a little bit as they have earned it.
  
• Don’t walk through a village or school openly eating as you will be mobbed by children asking for your food. It is also seen as rude if you openly eat while others aren't and you will be often asked to join people eating, to share with them.

What women wear in Malawi: A eulogy to the Chitenje

A question I quite often get asked is what clothing do women wear in Malawi, or what is the traditional Malawi dress.

The most commonly worn item of clothing by women in Malawi is the Chitenje (also known as a Kitenge in Tanzania and Kenya).

Here is a eulogy to the Chitenje in Malawi.

What is a Chitenje

A chitenje is a rectangle of fabric (generally 2 x 1 metres) worn by women around the waist or chest. Chintenjes are a cheap, everyday piece of clothing. They are very often covered with a great variety of pictures, colors, patterns and usually include slogans, including political slogans (especially when Hastings Banda was president).

Wearing the Chitenje

The chitenje is generally wrapped around the waist and tied as you would tie a towel or sarong. Normally clothing (certainly underwear) is worn under the chitenje and this can cover up slightly shabby clothes with the chitenje's multi-coloured fabric

Other uses for the Chitenje

Chitenje's can be worn around the head as well, wrapped in a similar way to a head towel, and is used for decoration or to cover any hair-dos that may be in progress. It is also a very useful cushion for carrying...well anything that can be carried on the head!

A chitenje also makes an incredibly useful custom sling for a baby (see the pictures to the right), and is either constructed so the baby can hang at the front, or slung over the back, with legs tucked around the side of the mum. Some of the more enterprising mothers are also able to breastfeed while the child is in the sling - allowing hands to be free for other, more imporant tasks!

To sum up - the common chitenje is a really useful bit of kit for women in Malawi, and on a final note the same cloth can be taken to a tailor and sewn into a dress, or shirt and skirt for special occasions e.g. Church on Sunday.

Tobacco in Malawi

Tobacco is the main export for Malawi.



Much of the tobacco in Malawi is produced on large estates, but there are many small holders who produce some tobacco to sell at auction each year. Small farms tend to diversify their crops and often grow a few tobacco plants, alongside other cash and subsistence crops.



The auction houses are in Limbe, Lilongwe and Mzuzu, and the auctions often take place around March and April each year.



Tobacco is cured in a number of ways, the most common being 'Burley' where it is laid out in long sheds and dried by the dun. A more expensive way is to flue-cure the tobacco, using wood fires in tall barns, this gives it a different flavour and will sell for more. Dark-fired tobacco (NDDF) is cured in small barns over a longer period of time in the presence of heavy smoke - this is used in cigars.



After curing, tobacco is sold in bales at auction where prices of all the types of tobacco are volatile, at the mercy of world markets.



You will sometimes see men and women chewing tobacco and smoking home-made cigarettes, and it is not uncommon to see people using it as snuff!

Find out more about Beer and Cannabis in Malawi.

Cannabis in Malawi

A very short post about cannabis in Malawi.


Cannabis is widely grown along the lakeshore to produce hemp for fishermen's nets. It is of course now sold as Malawi Gold to tourists and backpackers. As it is quite accessible, and very freely available, there are some incidences where it is even used by some schoolchildren, which results in behavioural problems.


Buying and selling cannabis is illegal, but it is very difficult to police in the remote areas where it is grown, and even in the cities police (like elsewhere in the world) have bigger priorities.

Find out more about Tobacco and Beer in Malawi.

Education in Malawi

A short overview on education in Malawi.

Nursery education:

Nursery education is extremely limited in Malawi - the government is now trying to improve this and is investing in building pre-schools, certainly in the cities. There are, of course, private nurseries for those that value education and have the money to pay for it.

Primary education:

Primary education in Malawi is supposed to begin at 5 yrs old. Schools start at Standard 1 and go up to Standard 8, which is the final year of primary. Pupils do not proceed to the next year group automatically, but when they pass the end of year exams. This results in some older children remaining at very early primary school grades for a number of years, and leaving primary education (Standard 8) almost adults. Primary education is free but not compulsory, but there is an enormous shortage of teachers (the standard of whom can be very low with outdated practices) due to a shortage of teacher training schools and facilities. Schools have little or no equipment, teachers are quite poorly paid and the facilities are basic with those lucky to have a classroom often sitting on the floor.

Secondary education:

It is extremely competitive to get into a state run secondary school. Private schools are available, with entrance exams, but many people are unable to afford these. In fact, people often find it hard to pay the nominal fees for state secondary education. It is often very academic, leading to MSCE (Malawi School Certificate in Education) which is equivalent to GSCEs in the United Kingdom. There is little vocational training to assist secondary school leavers with jobs post school - and doesn't allow for the spread of learning styles or encourage the pupils to think, rather deliver lessons verbatim.

Unemployment is high, and there are many jobseekers with MSCE qualifications, which doesn't encourage school pupils to enter secondary education.

Elite secondary schools:

There are a handful elite international private schools in Malawi available for rich Malawian and ex-pat pupils. Here they can take United Kingdom A-Levels and other international qualifications that make them eligible to continue their education around the world.

University education:

Tertiary education in Malawi is extremely limited, with a number of small universities in some of the major cities. To enter university, a malawian has to get certain grades, and pass an entrance exam to study. There are a wide range of subjects to study at university, but you may not get your first choice (as you have to put a 1st, 2nd and 3rd choice of subjects).

Job prospects after leaving university are much better, but there are still a dearth jobs for the graduiates to apply for.

Nsima - The staple food of Malawi

The staple food of malawi is Nsima.

Nsima is cooked, ground, white maize flour that is used as the stodge for the majority of malawian meals. The maize can either:

a) be ground by the family who take the dry maize kernels (sweetcorn to you and I) and then pound it with a huge pestle and mortar (most likely made of wood).

b) be bought from a shop where a more industrial process has mass produced the flour.

A cheaper version is a brown maize flour which is rougher in texture (but in my opinion more flavoursome!)

Nsima preparation

Ingredients: Maize flour - twice as much water as maize flour.

• Boil a kettle of water
• Whisk flour and water into a paste (about half a cup of flour, with a similar amount of water). You make the paste to avoid the nsima becoming lumpy.
• Stir the paste into a pot of simmering water, mixing constantly. The aim is to make a very runny porridge.
• Simmer (just below boiling) for 20-30 minutes and your nsima will thicken to the desired consistency.
• At this stage, add the rest of your flour while mixing vigorously with a heavy duty wooden spoon. Once you have added all the flour, keep stirring for about 5 minutes with the heat still on.
• Once the Nsima has formed a firm paste, allow it to steam with a lid on for a further 10 minutes on a very low heat
• Finally, get a bowl with water, and use a saucer or big spoon out of the pan into 'thick pancakes' which you can either dish onto plates or pile onto a serving dish for people to help themselves. Remember to dip the spoon or saucer in the water between each nsima cake to ensure they don't stick.

Police in Malawi

Police in Malawi are generally courteous and helpful, and will be more than happy to help you if you are asking for directions or information.

Traffic police in Malawi are a slightly different ball game. Depending
on the time of year (eg Xmas) they can look for the smallest problem
with your car or attitude and fine you for anything that might be out
of place!

Fines range from a few dollars/pounds to a much larger sum that needs
to be paid at the police station. Fines CAN be negotiable, however
don't expect an official receipt as these will go straight into your
officer's pocket!

Find out more about police in Malawi's reaction to cannabis.